i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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