i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
