i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
