You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize