She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
