We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
