Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
