Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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