On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
