what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
