actually, I'm a sock model
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
My feet surprised me
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