Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
