She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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