Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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