i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
