So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
