Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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