i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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