it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
