Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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