he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
