He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
