i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Cover your peen. We're going out.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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