What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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