You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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