Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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