were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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