Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
