Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
