rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize