and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
