I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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