What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
