I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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