Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Randomize
