Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
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