You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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