how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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