I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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