oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
