For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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