Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
