This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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