he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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