I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
