I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize