i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Randomize
