Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
