Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
