Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
