oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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